And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. Romans 8:26
“I will admit. Today has been one of those days when I am just not feeling it…whatever “it” may be.”
This begins my confession on Sunday morning to a congregation of kids, teens, and adults, all waiting for me to pray for the remainder of the service.
Now, waiting for a prayer from someone who just said they didn’t feel “it.”
But, wait a minute! You are a pastor! And, you told the congregation that?
Yep. Because I believe in transparency, even though it tends to get me in trouble at times. Because after reasoning with my “monster” who was upset about being in a different room for Sunday School. After watching the same monster throw himself on the floor while singing with that same congregation, I wasn’t feeling much of anything holy.
And, I am sure I was not the only person in that room who just didn’t feel it, either. I just happened to be the one who admitted it…to over 70 people.
Come on. Let’s face it. We ALL have days when “it” is the last thing we are feeling. Even pastors.
We have days when we have been beat up, bruised, battered. When everything has gone wrong, and “it” feels a million miles away. And, yes. Pastors feel like this, too.
Oh, wait. I didn’t mention what “it” was, did I?
“It” is the Holy Spirit.
And, when the world has tormented me. When I am frazzled, exhausted, overworked. When I am complacent, lazy, and bitter. When my kids have fried my last nerve. When I have bitten my husband’s head off. When I feel lonely and confused. “It,” the Holy Spirit, feels so far away.
“Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water.” John 7:38
Living water. “It.” The Holy Spirit.
Always with us. Hiding in our hearts. Holy. Sacred.
But, we let the world torment us. Get in the way. Fill the crevices of our hearts with emotion, so that we hide “it,” don’t feel “it.” When we really need “it” the most.
While the Holy Spirit is always with us, we often don’t feel it because we have so much other junk hiding away in our hearts.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Galatians 5:22-23
Replacing that junk we feel in our hearts so we can feel more of “it.”
Replacing frazzled, overworked, and exhausted with the Spirit of peace.
Instead of feeling complacent, lazy, and bitter, digging deep for the Spirit of faithfulness and joy.
When my kids have gotten on my last nerve, looking within for the Spirit of patience.
When I want to put my husband’s head on a platter, looking instead for the Spirit of self-control and love.
When I feel lonely, tormented, confused, and the last thing I feel is “it,” recognizing God has already placed the strength, endurance, and peace I need in my heart.
By simply recognizing how much I don’t have it all together, how I need His forgiveness, His grace, His strength-He released in me a new spirit.
A spirit to get us through the tough days. Even the days we just don’t feel “it.”