When my kids look at me, what do they see?
Do they see the things I tend to believe about myself? My self-hatred. My insecurities. The lies I allow myself to believe. Or, do they see a woman who believes she is wanted, cherished, loved, brave, and beautiful? Do they see the woman God sees?
When my kids witness me in action, what do they see?
A woman always questioning if God will show up, or one whose faith is unwavering? Do they witness the prayers of a weary mom, or do they see the control freak who thinks she has it all figured out?
When my kids hear me, what do they hear?
Do they hear words of encouragement for them and others, or do they hear groans of judgment and condemnation? Do they hear words of love for all those I encounter?
When my children watch me, what do they see?
Do they see me doing good things out of pure love, or for the praise of people? Do my choices reflect the ones I also want them to make? Do they learn about love or hate? Do they hear about being like Jesus, and think of me?
They are watching. They are learning from me. From you. From the world around us.
What am I teaching them?
And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching. Titus 2:7
And, there are so many times I fail to do this. I have at times failed miserably as a parent. I have not always been a shining example.
But, as my children walk through the journey of parenthood. As they start to navigate the world as adults who are also trying to be an example, my hope is that they won’t remember the times I failed. The times I didn’t show love, grace, or Jesus in my home, or outside of it.
I hope they remember my integrity, compassion, and honesty.
That when they think of an example they remember what they watched, witnessed, heard, and saw.
Then, I hope they think of me.