My first line of defense-Him!

Seeking him

Before I speak a word, let me hear Your voice. And in the midst of pain, let me feel Your joy.

-Lauren Daigle, “First”

You are having one of those moments. Maybe one of those days. Everything has gone wrong. Every possible obstacle and frustration stands directly in your path.

There is that email from a co-worker that lacks grace, and leaves you seething.

Your kids have spilled something, knocked over the plant, and yelled at each other one too many times.

You have been stuck for days inside, and in need of some fresh air, only to find that your only means of escaping cabin fever now won’t start.

That person cut you off in traffic. You are in the express lane behind someone with WAY more than 20 items.

Your neighbor has called the police on your dog…..AGAIN!

You react. You respond to that email in anger. Snap at the kids in frustration. Throw those keys on the ground, and slam the car door. Maybe shout a few expletives at that aggressive driver. Roll your eyes in the checkout line. Call the police and give them a piece of your mind, too.

Kicking. Screaming. Stomping reactions. And, well deserved, right? I mean…look at all that chaos before you?

It’s what I do. When all those emotions snap at once, and leave me a confused mess, I react.

When criticized, I react with defensiveness.

When inconvenienced, I react with frustration.

When attacked, I put up my dukes and get ready to fight. With words. With accusations. With yelling. With impatience. With my human emotions blazing.

Until, it’s over…and I hold my head in shame.

Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Ephesians 6:13

When I should be waiting, looking, asking for Him to react. When I should be relying on Him to defeat the chaos. Instead my first line of defense is to handle the battle on my own…

My first line of defense against criticism, frustration, inconvenience, and anger should be Him. A prayer. A plea from the one who can handle it.

Stopping to ask for the right words to respond to someone’s verbal attacks.

Stopping to ask for wisdom and guidance in handling the ups and downs of motherhood.

Stopping to ask for peace when crazy sets in.

Stopping to ask for eyes to see beyond my emotions…to see the person behind the wheel, the mom who may be in a hurry in the grocery store, too.

Stopping to ask for grace to forgive that neighbor. That co-worker.

Stopping to seek him in the midst of each hard to handle moment. Each battle. Each encounter.

So that next time my reaction will not cause me to hang my head in shame. So that my reaction will reflect Him. His light. His grace.

I wanna find you, in every season, in every moment. Before I speak a word, I will bring my heart, and seek You first. 

2 Comments

  1. Reblogged this on Journey With Jesus and commented:
    “I wanna find you, in every season, in every moment. Before I speak a word, I will bring my heart, and seek You first.” ~January Marshall

    Learning to turn first to God it something we all wrestle with and when the pressure builds from every side, everyone stands at the edge. He will forgive, of this there is no doubt. Hopefully, as we learn and grow, the signs become clearer when the struggle begins and we have the opportunity to stop first and rest in Him.
    Agreed… “My first lind of defense–HIM!”

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